its been a long time.

It's been quite a while since i last had an entry on my blog

nothing much today actually, came back home from painting the debate banner. a bit tired from the hot sun that kind of burned my back but oh well. I bought a reader's digest magazine from the petrol kiosk outside, just finished reading through it and it made me want to post :)

I read an article about how this cambodian woman(who was a prostitute herself) helps young prostitutes escape the dark world of brothels. i read about 10 inspiring Asians and their 2010 new year resolutions, which included Dr. William Tan. It was simply insprirational and gave me quite a bit of food for thought.

Regarding the first article, its kind of like even if you know that there's such horrifics going on to young women worldwide, everytime you read an article about stuff like that you go like "woah, that is serious." and then it makes you think like what have you been doing? you are so lucky to be born in a safe country to loving parents and have people who care for you. have you really made full use of what you have that those people do not have? Then you realise that whatever so-called "hardships and sorrows" that you go through in school, at home, wherever and with whoever that make you proclaim "OMG i feel like dying" "Why is the world like this to me?" "WTH" etc.. all of that does not compare to what other people, who are in a more disadvantaged position then you are, are going through. Somehow it makes yourself feel kind of immature, clueless, senseless, failure-ish, ungrateful etc.. It makes you ask yourself, "why have you been doing so badly in school etcetc when you have everything these people, who most of the time, only dream of what you have. you have a family, friends and a healthy self. why arent you doing your best in what you do? why arent you motivated or disciplined enough to just strive for what you want?" ok..maybe the last one is just me. but any-o-how, its true. at the same time, the other side to the article allows yourself to dream of what you could achieve for yourself and for society in the future. The woman helping out all the younger ladies is Somaly Mam. Pure inspriration, like seriously. After being repressed for some years, her anger and hatred started to escape when she witnessed the death of a girl younger then herself then being shot in the head 3 times for attempting to escape prostitution. With the help of a french-men, she managed to break free from prostitution at 21(well they also considered her invaluable, since the disgusting, shallow, insecure MCPs prefer younger girls and more often than not ask for virgins. some girls even after losing their virginity are sewn up again, to produce artificial virgin vags for disgusting, shallow, insecure MCPs to have what they consider a little fun. some girls even have to do 20 men a night. I say its just plain disgusting and an insult to women. are we toys for pleasure NO! now before we get further side tracked, lets continue with the story of somaly) She found a new job as a chamber maid in france and regained her self-pride. When she followed her husband (yes, she married the frenchie but they divorced later on. 3 kids) back to cambodia because of work, she wanted to do something. she now heads AFESIP (acting for women in distressing situations) and has 3 shelters in cambodia. but helping these girls puts herself in danger, her shelters had been rampaged, the girls rekidnapped by pimps and a gun has even been put to her head. her daughter was once even kidnapped, now her children study in france. she gives the freed women a new chance at life, education, skills, jobs, businesses, some are even able to marry. the older women call her sister, the young orphans call her mummy. its just amazing how she can pull herself up and start something new and help others. mind you, she still has "scars". not being able to sleep for more than 3-4 hours straight, feeling naseous each time she steps into a brothel, the inability to go back to the brothel she was in due to sheer fear. makes you kind of think "wow, i wish i could help the way she did." lols, ok maybe that's just me again but yeah... Maybe in future i can, not neccessarily in her sector of help but perhaps aiming at different people. really makes you dream about the positive imapct that you could serve to the world.

ok second article, the 2010 new year's resolution for 10 inspiring asians. ok to be honest so far i only read Dr William Tan's because he's been to my school, helped my school raise funds and i've read his book. so there, plus he's cool so yeah. when i first heard that dr tan had cancer i was quite shocked cos its like you've heard about all his triumphs against adversity and how he's overcome his physical disability to do what he does best that you kind of think that nothing can bring this person down ever. well, life works the way you don't want it to. so it was very uplifting to see dr tan back and starting up his engine once again (he had a bone marrow transplant in october). even though his physical frame is much noticably weaker than before, you can tell that his fighting spirit is still very much there and is even stronger than before. its just like super cool how someone can like bounce back after very tough times, and not to mention become even stronger. it's like.....ok i dont know how to describe it without repeating a word that had already used earlier.

you know what, i don't think i'll give myself a new year's resolution for next year because i don't think i need to make myself realise even more how much i need to do it, how much i need to achieve it. i know what i need to do.

ok, now with some lighter news about my life recently. hee, SUPER SHOW II the best ever. seriosuly it was damn good and im not just saying that cos im a fan of suju. but if you went not as a fan, you'd be wowed to with the standard of performance they gave. non-stop 3 hours dancing and singing. as performers, they are really like the best. :) would have been the best if kang in and ki bum were there. it was hot! lols siwon like stripped, then they all got wet and started to tear leeteuk's shirt apart. hee, leeteuk got buff. hahaha. aw. and he cried when they sang shining star, like very badly. but i don't blame him lols, i would get overwhelmed to if i had 16,000 fans singing my song and screaming their hearts out for me and creating star patterns with their light sticks. lols, he wasn't the only one who cried, i think yesung did too. lols, i think if it were me performing in front of 16,000 screaming fans i would cry like a abay too, its like so overwhelming, how much support and love you can get from people. lols, stayed at the same hotel as them too. found out that they stayed on the 11th floor. so when ever we took the lift we would "accidentally" press the 11th floor button and when the door opens have scary bodyguards staring at us, then we act like "oh, what floor is this?" lols it was quite funny. but security was tight like anything. but when they came back from the first night i saw them in the lobby from a distance. 2nd day of concert saw them up front like 1 m away and like omg soooo freaking hot! like seriously even with make up and stuff. the 3 best looking were, in no particular order: donghae, hankyung and siwon. seriously! the others looked good too, but 3 of them were like WOAH! HOT! lols. All 13 of them were like glowing. it was cool. at the concert, we actually went in 5 mins late so we missed man in love(1st song) but managed to catch a glimpse of the firewroks and stuff. a bit sad since a man in love dance is freaking cool. i wanna learn. haha,but omg kyu solo was to put it short, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" hee, yi hui was so hung up over insomnia. lols. but the sound system was not very good. made some of them sound a bit weird. did i mention that both me and hui screamed extra loud whenever henry and zhou mi came out. stupid fans were chanting only 13. we thought it was just plain rude and kind of uneccessary since zhou mi and henry are only members of the sub group. and henry's featuring in don't don was just to play the violin. sometimes i think fans overreact too much. hee, then when they sang marry you, kyu almost cried. hee :) and during one song when it was eunhyuk's turn to sing, kyuhyun went super close to him and then they stood face to face and got nearer and nearer and then were like about to "kiss" when kyu stuck out his tongue and eunhyk laughed!!!!!! hahaha, so much fanservice <3>

i have typed quite a lot, lols i think i started typing this post at 2 plus. its been like 2hours. but i've been flitting in and out looking at otherstuff too so. hm. t was nice to post again. should start doing it more often than like twice a year. lols

i apologise for the erractic part about bangkok, wasnt really in chronological order just kind of typed what came to mind hee~

hope you enjoyed readin my blog and happy holidays!

wth was that line all about, "hope you enjoyed readin my bolg..." eww

sorry feeling a bit schizophrenic :)